After the release of her sophomore album “Punisher” in 2020, Phoebe Bridgers is back with her long-awaited third album, “Lost Weekend.”
If you are grappling with grief, falling deeply in or out of love or simply gravitating toward the calming sound of Phoebe Bridgers, this one is for you. Essentially, throughout the album, she is telling us that love is pain, and loving someone can reveal the most vulnerable version of yourself.
I immersed myself in three different listening experiences with this album to form a solid opinion on an artist I adore and relate to in so many ways.
First, I attended a planetarium experience on Tuesday, August 11. I ran into the Orange Coast College Planetarium, partially because I was late and partially out of excitement, where my name was checked off the list for the sold-out event. My phone was shut off and locked inside a Yondr pouch, similar to what will be required on her highly anticipated upcoming tour.
The album was played in its entirety, paired with visuals from night-sky photographer Babak Tafreshi. Newsflash: It was a spiritual experience, and I sobbed from the first note of the album.
I was transfixed by the visuals paired with every song: a mix of northern lights, stars, outer space, vast deserts and everything else you would associate with true Phoebe fashion. I blinked, the lights were being turned back on and the album was over.
I walked away feeling like I had just listened to one of the most beautiful pieces of music I had ever heard. I couldn’t pick out a single song I liked more than the next. It felt like Bridgers truly made an album you are meant to listen to from start to finish. From the dreamy intro to “Governor’s Waltz,” which made me feel like I was dancing across the sky, to the pin-drop, abrupt silences during “Kill Me,” and then hearing a voicemail from her dad in “Never Going Back!” — you could feel the grief woven throughout her music.
I was left wanting nothing more than to go back and listen to the album again, to remember all of those lyrics I had resonated with so deeply. But I had to wait until Thursday, August 13, at 11 p.m., when I found myself in a record store, Zia Records in Las Vegas, after hours, signing my name on a sticky note in hopes of winning something signed by Phoebe herself.
The listening party started with a recording from Phoebe thanking all of us for coming, and then the album was spun. I began sifting through rows of vinyl and immediately felt in my groove.
I typically never lean toward the first track on an album, but with “Lost Weekend,” Phoebe pulls you in immediately. “The Outside” starts with a long, ringing noise before she begins singing in a synthesized, echoey, almost robotic voice. Then it shifts into a piano ballad, and she begins singing in her distinct voice. It felt like coming home.
As the album moved into the more folk-driven sound of “Haunted,” I remembered the lyric that had resonated with me so deeply: “I have no secrets, only feelings and I know those go away. There is a difference between lying and deciding what not to say.”
I mean, talk about hitting close to the heart. It pinpoints those moments when you sit in your room crying because that is all you can feel in certain moments when you are alone with your feelings, but then you wipe up those tears and eventually have to go on with your day and life. That is why I have always loved the way she writes. There is something so raw and vulnerable, but also gorgeous about it. She taps into reality.
I continued walking around the store and eventually met up with a friend. We sat in the corner talking about our love for her as the album played on. The center of the album struck when there was the more upbeat mix of “Still Standing” paired with devastating lyrics. The focus is on a complicated relationship with her father, but the ending shifts focus to almost an apology/acceptance. When someone passes, specifically someone you share a unique relationship with, you recount everything they did and didn’t do for you. That is why the ending is so special and gave me chills as “I can’t imagine you dead. But you are everyday. Thank you for everything,” pushed through the speakers above me.
When the final song, “Lost Weekend (Reprise),” began, I was struck by its direct connection to grief. It almost feels like you are transported into her mind as she grapples with losing someone, recounting old stories, confronting the idea that someone is never coming back, and slowly accepting that as the truth.
But there is also something promising in knowing that “you love me and I won’t ever let you forget, not yet.”
I stood up, purchased my exclusive poster and records, and started the drive home.
Naturally, my third listen happened on that ride. This was my first experience listening to the album completely alone, with just me, the road and my thoughts.
First, the direct parallel in “As Above” to “Afraid of Heights” from boygenius’ “the rest” almost made me pull over. “Now, I don’t want to live forever. But I don’t wanna die” has always been a lyric that stood out to me, ever since that small record surprised us before the hiatus. Hearing it again in her solo work felt defiant.
Second, my favorite track on the album is the title track: “Lost Weekend.” The song feels like a distant dream as she sings about past betrayal and love. My favorite lyric — and I would even go as far as to say one of my favorite things she has ever written — is: “I loved you, and you couldn’t forgive me for that.”
Overall, “Lost Weekend” shows that Phoebe Bridgers is back and better than ever, while continuing to grow as an artist. After experiencing the album in three different ways, I cannot wait to see how she brings these songs to life on tour and pairs them with the older work we already know and love.
words&photo_ruby tavano.
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