Nights out are notorious for blackout anecdotes, deep-fried drunk food and raging hang-xiety. While these rages aren’t always a bad thing, is there a way to find balance among the parties? As an avid health-junkie, I set out on a social experiment to do just that. My main goals included keeping excess calories to a minimum, dancing as a form of exercise, and, of course, having fun. Taking meal-prep precautions and calorie-tracking measures, join me in incorporating healthy habits into a Saturday night at LIV.
8:00pm: Grub-Up
+450 calories
Unlike half the female population of the University of Miami, I always eat before going out for a multitude of reasons. Firstly, I love food. Having a little post-dinner bloat is no biggie, especially since I don’t plan on meeting my soulmate at LIV. Skipping dinner? Unfathomable. Secondly, drinking on an empty stomach is considered amateur hour amongst regular drinkers. Yes, I could get drunk quicker, but I have a vomit phobia and would like to keep my stomach lining intact for the time being. And finally, food is fuel. My feet will be off the ground half the night if the music is bumping, so I’ll need some gas in the tank to keep me dancing.
You might be thinking, “Gosh, that looks like a disgusting, naked pizza.” You’d be correct. I can’t digest gluten or dairy — my life is so fun — so I had to make some recipe tweaks. Pictured is my homemade gluten-free protein pizza crust, Rao’s pizza sauce, basil and black olives. I ate a balance of carbs, protein and flavor in one recipe to set my night in motion. Some other meal ideas include stir-fry, pasta salad, loaded sandwiches and sushi takeout.
10:00pm: Pre-Game Bevs
+245 calories
Pre-game beverage choices can make or break your night. I had two priorities: get a buzz in motion and keep my calories to a minimum. As a caffeine addict, this looked like a mango-passionfruit Celsius with about two shots of Tito’s vodka. The mixer — Celsius — gives me a kick from the caffeine and a pleasant flavor to mask the alcohol, all while maintaining a low-calorie profile. And as for the vodka, you can’t go wrong with the college go-to handle: Tito’s.
Be warned: mixing caffeine and alcohol comes with a risk. Caffeine is an “upper,” and alcohol is a “downer,” so your heart is being pulled in different directions. Only mix the two if you have a tolerance for both caffeine and alcohol and even then, do so with caution. White Monsters and Celsius are my guilty pleasures when it comes to a pre-game caffeine kick, and of course, sugar-free Red Bulls are a classic.
12:10am: Arrive at LIV and Start the Apple Watch
+0 calories
What the promoter says goes — Rafael requested us at midnight. We arrived promptly 10 minutes late to the mecca of Miami clubs located in the FontaineBleau Hotel: LIV. After standing amidst women in teeny-tiny clothes and men soaked in flashy cologne, we walked through the double doors at the entrance.
I started an Apple Watch workout under the “dance” category to track my caloric output for the night. Keep in mind that Apple Watch calorie counting isn’t always accurate. I consistently track my lifting and cardio workouts using it, so I have a baseline to know if the dance workout will be relatively accurate compared to the intensity of my other workouts. Stay tuned for the final breakdown.
12:15am: Club Drink #1
+184 calories
Being a girl in Miami has its perks — most notably, free entry and free drinks. Atop beloved Rafael’s table in LIV sat bottles of tequila and vodka alongside jugs of cranberry juice, pineapple juice and a clear liquid I’d guess was club soda for mixers. The first drink of the night was a vodka cranberry. While I can’t exactly infer what brand of vodka or cranberry juice was used or the amounts, the average vodka cranberry beverage is 184 calories — according to Google.
12:50am: Club Drink #2
+165 calories
Tequila girls are the coolest people I know. Despite all my most dedicated efforts, I am not one of them. However, when you are handed a free drink at the tables of LIV, you don’t say no. So, with hesitant gratitude, I accepted my second drink of the night from the bottle girls: a tequila pineapple. Cringing with every sip, I finished it as quickly as I could.
1:15am: Hydrate or Die-drate
+0 calories
Fun fact: the most common cause of hangovers is dehydration. Alcohol is a diuretic, so more drinking equals more peeing. Thus, like a mule in the desert, I keep my eyes peeled for any available water sources during a night out. Rafael fetched me a mini Fiji water bottle, and I could hydrate in style.
2:00am: Club Drink #3
+184 calories
Intent on keeping the good vibes rolling — or not losing the buzz — I happily accepted another vodka-cran from the bottle girls. At this point in the night, the beverage went down a little too smoothly. Note: I’m not sure when I lost my thumb press-on nail, but it seemed to disappear at some point in my camera roll’s progression of events.
3:30am: Home Sweet Home and Final Apple Watch Check
-412 calories
One thing about me: I’m notorious for leaving at a reasonable hour. I’m not a freshman anymore, and my energy levels aren’t what they used to be . The only thing happening at 6 a.m. in my apartment is sleep. So, I came home with enthusiasm to get at least a few good hours of sleep. While a hangover on Sunday was inevitable, getting as much rest as possible would curb those unsavory symptoms.
Upon arriving home, I ended my “dance” workout on my Apple Watch. Throughout the three-and-a-half hours at the club, I burned a total of 412 active calories. For some context on accuracy, my AppleWatch says I burn an average of 400 calories per hour of intense weightlifting. Since my activity at LIV was moderate in comparison, I would say those 412 calories were a pretty accurate estimation of dancing to EDM for over three hours.
4:00am: Snacks and Hydration
+345 calories
I won’t lie to you, I opened my Uber Eats, which seemed to glow in green with an inflating appetite. Late-night fried food was my greatest temptation, and while I often give in, I opted for healthier choices I prepared earlier in the evening.
LesserEvil popcorn, specifically the Homer’s Blend flavor for my garlic lovers, was my first victim. A serving or two gave my stomach enough volume and carbs. Next, I munched on some fresh berries for a makeshift dessert.
Finally, I tore open a bag of Drizzilicious pumpkin spice bites: a sweet treat to cap me off. I chugged from my pre-filled water bottle. The key here is to set yourself up for success: prepare your snacks and fill your water bottle beforehand. Future drunk you will thank you.
10:00am: Hydration Stick and Hot Girl Walk
-238 calories
Sunday scaries are real. As tempting as it was to rot in bed with some “Harry Potter” movies in the background, I motivated myself to touch some grass — literally. I threw on some sneakers and strolled through the neighborhood near the Biltmore golf course. Fantasizing about the beautiful houses was entertaining enough, but I also played some healing music in my Airpods. Over an hour and five miles later, my mind and body felt refreshed.
Finally, to curb my headache and dehydration, I poured my favorite hydration brand’s stick into a glass of icy water. Ultima uses good ingredients to make thirst-quenching flavors, my favorites being cherry-pomegranate and blue raspberry. The added electrolytes nurtured my dehydrated body, and I felt good as new by the afternoon.
Total Net Calories: 923 calories*
*Note: I eat dinner and snacks whether I go out or not, so not counting that, net calories equal 128.
No matter what RedCup Miami has you believing, it is possible to incorporate health into a night out. Though calories aren’t the only measure of health, let’s examine the total — not including my dinner and snacks that I would’ve consumed on any ordinary night. When strictly looking at drink intake and physical output, a net 128 calories is a relatively low number. Additionally, ensuring my sleep schedule wasn’t completely wrecked and hydrating my hangover away, my body recovered to have a relatively productive Sunday. Let this be your sign that balance is possible, even at one of the best clubs in the U.S.
words, photo&design_lizzie kristal.
This article was published in Distraction’s Winter 2024 print issue.
Follow our Social Media:
