The face of the incel movement presents itself as waxed-headed businessmen and jawline-shaving influencers — but who are its followers and what’s in it for them?
(No) Lay Of The Land
Incel culture and its conjoint red pill movement permeate the media. If you watched
the award-winning series “Adolescence,” you’ve seen it. If you’ve stumbled across a debate podcast that pits 40-year-old men against 20-year-old Only Fans models, you’ve heard it.
The term “incel” and its resulting online community arose from a number of involuntarily celibate men, some of whom place anger or blame on women for their ‘single’ status.
“They don’t view women as humans, as people with emotions. Just something to own,” said University of Miami senior microbiology and immunology major Ashley Tongkam.
Incels are drawn to platforms like red pill content and their supposed “truths” about
gender roles. These “truths” conclude that society favors women over men, men are naturally dominant over women and feminism has corrupted modern relationships.
Dr. Claire Oueslati-Porter, a UM gender and sexuality studies professor, assured these misogynistic attitudes aren’t limited to this community, nor are they new.
“The culture of media misogyny was already in place before anybody had the internet. It’s just that the internet has provided an outlet where there can be this sort of exacerbation of the misogyny and violence that’s already there,” Porter said.
What’s the Appeal?
For their privacy, one student who we will refer to as Ben said, “From discussions that I’ve had with friends, it’s like when you’re like, ‘Screw love. I don’t even care about this, I’m gonna go work on myself,’ which could dangerously tap into toxic masculinity.”
Whether it’s in reaction to a break-up or an outright rejection, some may find it simpler to shed their empathy for others than to address their own emotions.
Senior creative advertising major, Amaranta Ortizsaid, “It’s just so easy to hate people. It’s really easy to just be like, ‘Well, I deserve this, and you suck for not giving it to me.’”
Entitlement may also play a role when a platform’s rhetoric equates a woman’s abstinence to “gatekeeping” sex.
“You start seeing being in a relationship with another person as a transaction. It’s more of a goal. Even if you’re dating, you’re not dating for good intentions. It’s for you to add the number and be like, ‘Okay, cool. Done that,’” Ben said.
The appeal of an online community starts with connection, but for groups that perpetuate objectification, bigotry and hatred, it becomes more about holding and maximizing power.
Oueslati-Porter referenced political figures that may offer encouragement to the incel community, including President Trump who was held liable for sexual abuse.
“It would really be impossible not to connect the rhetoric and ideology of the current
administration with the so-called incels. Now, that doesn’t mean that he’s responsible solely, but I do think he gives a kind of sense of identity and inspiration to a lot of men.”
While loneliness may be enough impetus for some incels to contribute to the platform,
there are broader social structures at play, particularly amidst women’s increasing financial independence.
UM psychology lecturer Dr. Elyse Hurtado said, “Maybe part of the explanation is that men are trying to keep their power, trying to maintain their dominant position in society.
Nobody Wins
Incel culture appears to drive up concerns in both men and women.
A student who we will refer to as Jake said, “There are guys on TikTok that try to convince young men if they change their habits, they’ll get more attractive. It can be small things, like ‘hey, you should drink more water,’ to ‘bone smashing’ where they literally hit their face with a hammer.”
The “looks-maxxing” phenomena is an offspring of the culture in which influencers insist severe surgical alterations are a solution to involuntary celibacy.
“Men in general are a lot more insecure or self-conscious,” Jake said.
When searching for community, one would hope they’re met with compassion – not criticisms on their canthal tilts. “It means the angle of your eyes,” Jake explained.
Meanwhile, women are double-checking men’s Instagram Followings in fear of finding Andrew Tate or other influencers known for their misogynistic takes.
“It makes me more picky with men which is the opposite of what they’re trying to gain out of this whole community,” Ortiz said. “I have to really screen a man before I even think about being friends with him. I’m like, ‘Okay, first of all, do you see me as a human being?’
Holding Out Hope
Through the lens of isolating algorithms and echo-chambers, challenging incel culture might seem difficult. Through the lens of institutionalized patriarchy and deeply-rooted misogyny, it probably feels impossible.
Hurtado said, “If you want to change what people think, you want to first try to meet them where they are, try to show empathy, understanding, compassion and then pull them along gently… It has to be a process.”
Open communication is imperative to reaching agreements. Unfortunately, who does the talking matters too.
“Men need to do work with young men,” Oueslati-Porter said. “Men who are coaches, men who are presidents in their fraternities or in leadership roles really need to do the work there to influence them into understanding that this is obviously an unacceptable behavior.”
As long as people are holding these conversations, they can hold out hope for mutual understanding and connection.
words_kelsey conrad. photo_genevieve jones. design_cole selden.
This article was published in Distraction’s Spring 2026 print issue.
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