We are always hearing about skincare routines and new Pilates workouts for women, but where are the reminders for men to start checking in on their physical and mental health? We need men at the U to speak up about what self-care really means and why it is needed.
Breaking the Bro Code
No matter your age or place of origin, it’s no secret that there is a stigma surrounding men’s self-care, especially mental health. For generations, men have grown up instilled with the “boys don’t cry” mindset. Whether it be skincare, therapy or antidepressants, men are often seen as weak for trying to better themselves. But how do we call an end to this?
Self-care conversations are largely centered around women through face masks, Pilates, yoga and spa culture. It is great to see this flourish, especially in recent years, but men are too often left out of this dialogue. Men need to take care of themselves too, and this does not need to consist of the same routine. Self-care should never be treated as a luxury; it is a necessity for all.
Physical Doesn’t Mean Invincible
Society often equates masculinity with the ability to remain tough in difficult situations. Although there can be a correlation, with too much emphasis on strength, the ability to confront emotions is suppressed. According to the American Psychological Association, men are significantly less likely to speak up about their mental health. This is unfortunately in line with the fact that they are also 3.5 times more likely to commit suicide, with even higher rates for men of color and those with disabilities.
The long-standing idea that strong men go without struggle has created a toxic culture of silence. But by bottling things up, we tend to burst. True strength isn’t about ignoring our emotions; it’s about knowing when to reach out and address them.
At college age, and especially in Miami, physical fitness is of utmost importance. Exercise is an excellent form of self-care with an endless list of health benefits, but for many, it can enable symptoms of body dysmorphia. The pressure to achieve unrealistic perfection and “never being enough” will only ever lead to burnout and anxiety. It is important to have a healthy relationship with the gym and set realistic goals for yourself.
“I think a lot of the guys, athletes mostly, feel like they always have to be pushing themselves,” said Colin Olivio, a club rugby player at UM. “If you’re not pushing yourself to the limit, they say you’re doing it wrong. But I’ve seen how this mindset can destroy people over time. Rest is just as important as training.”
Jack Miller, a UM public relations professor and decorated veteran, said, “During my military career, and later while working with the Wounded Warrior project, I realized that we were trained to be physically strong, yet showing mental vulnerability was often shown as weakness. Over time, I learned that unseen wounds can impact a person’s well-being even more than visible ones.”
For athletes, professors and students alike, rest and recovery aren’t signs of weakness — rather, they’re necessary for growth. You can only make it so far without the mental resilience to keep going.
Redefining Strength
Communication is one of the strongest tools a man can have, especially when it comes to self-care. The ability to talk about emotions and stress is imperative in breaking the long-standing stigma that vulnerability is a sign of weakness in men.
“Communication is the foundation of mental wellness,” said Stephanie Sullivan, a licensed psychologist and professor at Monmouth University and Brookdale Community College. “As men learn that expressing themselves won’t diminish their masculinity, we start to see real change.”
In more cases than not, silence needs to be swapped out with dialogue. And yes, that can be hard. According to Mastermind Behavior, the average Gen Z’er spends 6.5 hours on their phone each day, which leads to heightened feelings of isolation in men. Whether it be through more professional means like counseling services or casual interactions like sports teams, friendships and even making small talk with a stranger, opening up allows men to connect with themselves and others. The truth is, talking it out is a declaration of strength that reaps real benefits.
Resources for U
If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health — or even just wants to chat — the UM Counseling Center is an excellent resource, providing free therapy sessions for students. The university also has programs on mindfulness, stress management and healthy living habits, as well as a nutritionist to help meet student needs.
The truth is that speaking up is the hardest part. Taking care of yourself is the strongest thing you can do, and you will improve your quality of life while taking charge and inspiring others to do the same.
words_joseph sollitto. photo_valentina gomez. design_charlotte deangelis.
This article was published in Distraction’s Winter 2025 print issue.
Follow our Social Media:
