A grainy profile picture with shadows over half your face, a poorly-cropped picture of you holding up a freshly-caught fish, a bio that reads: UMiami 26’ — emphasis on the apostrophe in the wrong place. The reality is simply that a lot of guys don’t know how to use Instagram. If you feel like you have this problem, you’re not alone. We’re here to let you in on some of the golden rules of a good Instagram feed.
Short and Sweet
Whether it’s your username, your bio or your number of posts, less is more. You want your profile to be memorable. No one’s going to remember that corny celebrity quote you chose or the names of your 50 story highlights. Instead, try to keep it punchy and unique.
Posting every once in a while — anywhere from once or twice a month to once a year — emphasizes quality over quantity. You might want to come across a little bit mysterious, or at least not log every day of your life on the profile grid.
Be careful not to keep it too short. You should be conveying your personality in some way, even if you’d rather face away from the camera, or link a song you like in your bio instead of using your own words.
Consistency is Key
One of the best ways to stand out on Instagram is to single in on your style. Take a look at your posts. Is there a color scheme you gravitate towards? Do you like to show off your outfits? Do you take really good outdoor photos?
Figuring out a theme that suits you will instantly elevate your profile. Even if it’s something as simple as a light or dark color palette, consistency makes your posts feel more intentional.
Rule of Thirds
You don’t have to be a professional photographer to take an eye-catching photo. The rule of thirds is something of a buzzword for the Instagram girls, but it’s pretty much the foundation of the perfect shot, and it’s probably the easiest way to up your game.
To follow the rule of thirds, turn on the 3×3 grid on your camera — on an iPhone, go to Settings > Camera > Grid, and turn it on. You should see two vertical and two horizontal lines over your screen. Line up the horizontal lines with the horizon: this will give you a straight photo with no need for adjustment.
Then, look at the points where the lines intersect each other. Whatever your subject is — the most important thing in the photo — have it fall on one of these points. This keeps the rest of the photo open, and naturally draws the eye to where the subject is. You can experiment with putting your subject on the right or left side, or maybe even one of the corners of the picture. That way, not everything is dead-center, and your feed won’t look too monotone.
Silent Posting
The silent post is an Instagram veteran’s best-kept secret, so keep this between us. If you want something to put on your profile grid, but don’t want to make a big deal out of it, here’s what you do: hit “post,” then “archive” as fast as you can. This makes it disappear from everyone’s feed. After a few days have passed, go into your archive — tap the three lines in the top right corner of your profile to find it — and click “show on profile to return the post to your feed.
The point of the silent post is to add to your profile grid with something that doesn’t deserve a spotlight for itself.
The best silent posts are single pictures, usually casual, like a sunset, or a page from a book you’re pretending to read. It says something about your personality, it’s a little mysterious and it gives your curated gallery of posts a little more variety.
The Art of the Photo Dump
There used to be a time, in the dark ages of social media, when posting meant agonizing over the one perfect photo to post. Now, you can post 10, even 20 slices of your camera roll all at once. It’s almost overwhelming.
A photo dump isn’t as careless as it sounds. It really takes a certain level of craft, but that doesn’t mean you can’t have fun with it.
Here’s the essential components of almost any great photo dump: a solo picture, a candid of your friends — something totally in the moment, unstaged — a food picture, a nature picture and of course, a silly one. Whether it’s a relevant meme from your camera roll or a particularly unflattering pic, save the funny moment for the end. And don’t tell us to “swipe for a surprise” — that makes it not a surprise, doesn’t it?
Of course, this isn’t a formula you have to stick to. But if you post ten slides of you and your boys lined up and mogging at the camera without any variety, most people are scrolling past after slide three.
The photo dump is where you can show some personality with something other than pictures of your face. Don’t feel pressured to include all twenty slides, either. Again, less is more, and there’s nothing more boring than a pointless filler.
words_jay moyer. photo_ethan dosa. design_sal puma.
This article was published in Distraction’s Winter 2024 print issue.
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